This Valentine's Day -- Ask, Tell, Be Who You Are

O how peaceful, how sparsely attended, is the urban, mostly gay gym on Valentine's Day night!

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At the risk of returning to the Dan Savage well once too often, here comes another reference: Last Friday's New York Times (I just saw it today) had a pungent and droll op-ed piece by him, "Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Ex-Gay Cowboys." It's worth reading the whole thing, but here's an excerpt:

"Evangelical Christians seem sincere in their desire to help build healthy, lasting marriages. Well, if that's their goal, encouraging gay men to enter into straight marriages is a peculiar strategy. Every straight marriage that includes a gay husband is one Web-browser-history check away from an ugly divorce."

And in today's Washington Post, " 'Don't Ask' Costs More Than Expected: Military's Gay Ban Seen in Budget Terms":

"The financial costs to the U.S. military for discharging and replacing gay service members under the nation's 'don't ask, don't tell' policy are nearly twice what the government estimated last year, with taxpayers covering at least $364 million in associated funds over the policy's first decade, according to a University of California report scheduled for release today."

Here's the paragraph that really caught my eye:

" 'The policy is more expensive than we thought it was, in many ways,' said retired Rear Adm. John D. Hutson, a former Navy judge advocate general who was on the [UC-Santa Barbara] panel. 'The real cost is the cost in human dignity, in self-respect, and in the image of the military held by the American public, the world community and itself. . . . The dignity of the armed forces is at stake.' "

Someone send a box of chocolates to retired Rear Admiral John D. Hutson.